The Handle Is Slippery With My Sweaty Palms. (Warning: Long Post Abound)

That's not what she said.

Anyway, hello guys. I am back from the mini-holiday I had at Persephone's province. I'll be honest and say that I loved it mostly because it provided me a momentary escape, yet at the same time it was able to provide me the space and time I needed to think things over.

So, how to start talking about the experience...

Weirdo and I met up at the train station on Monday afternoon. It took more or less 45 minutes for us to get to the McDonald's where we were supposed to meet up with Persephone. After grabbing food to bring with us on the bus, we took a cab to the station then we boarded the bus at, say, 7pm. The trip was fun—I sat beside Persephone and we spent half the time making fun of Weirdo. Sometimes the topic would veer into the thing I've been posting about lately, but my friends are awesome enough to know that constantly talking about it wouldn't help me at all.

We got to Perse's place at around 12 in the evening, which isn't that bad considering how the trip could've been longer if the traffic had been heavy. When we got off the bus, you all should have seen the look on my face. I even remember saying, 'Oh my fucking god it even smells different!'

Perse's mum answered the door, but I was really intimated at first because I thought her mum was her older sister. So I was sort of hiding behind Weirdo until Perse finally introduced us. Then I finally got to look inside Perse's house and I thought, 'Omg. A bohemian chic house. A really cool mum. I SO HAPPEH!'

Since we didn't really get proper dinner before the 5-hour bus trip, we ate Tinola while we talked about the trip. We got to talk to Perse's mum as we ate, which was really nice considering how most parents of my girl friends are rather reserved and conservative. We then proceeded to be fed fruits (And let me tell you this—fruits from the province are THE BEST) and we drank tea with our truffles. It was just our first night in the province and I was already feeling like I'll have a lot of fun eating there and spending time with Weirdo, Perse and her mum.

After our midnight snack/dinner/tea, we headed to Perse's mum's room (It was 'our' room for the mini-holiday). We talked about the most random things (mostly about our past lives and similar stuff) until we decided to sleep at around 3am. The really cool thing about Perse's mum is that she didn't feel iffy about having the three of us sleep in one room together. She really trusted her daughter, which I believe is something you don't see everyday amongst parents and their children. I love how Perse and her mum treated each other like sisters. I know I keep harping on about marriage and those sorts of things, but from this trip I realised that not all familial relationships have to be constricting and just plain painful.

The next day was just as fun. For breakfast, we had cow guts soup (I've forgotten how it's called(A)) with the best hot chocolate I've ever had. We ate puto without the cow guts soup and let me tell you this—it was so good I wanted to cry right then and there. After breakfast, we were so full and content that we just hung around the house looking at Perse's old drawings whilst listening to the songs she has recorded. I love how Perse's mum is so proud of her, and how she collected all her drawings—even the ones she drew when she was still really young. In fact, Perse's mum still had her first drawings with her. We did that until lunch was ready, and suddenly breakfast at Perse's place was nothing compared to lunch.

For lunch, we had milkfish, pork and Ginataang Gulay. I swear my Gluttony mode was switched on once I got to taste the milkfish. Despite being a big fan of fish, I was never a fan of milkfish until that certain milkfish.  Even Weirdo was converted. On top of that, we had lunch outdoors. I know it's no big deal, but when you have it in Perse's province in a hut it's definitely something that would make you feel ridiculously happy and chill at the same time. I even started to question why people loved the city so much. The city has nothing on the province's pure atmosphere. It's not just the air that's clean, I swear. Everything felt so good, plus the place was full of friendly elementals. I couldn't see them but their positive emotions helped me a lot.

After lunch, we decided to just hang out at the hut. I had the hammock to myself whilst Perse and Weirdo shared the outdoor sofa bed, or whatever you call it. I soon fell asleep as I listened to them talk, and when I woke up it was already around 5pm. Perse had gone on to have a bath whilst Weirdo was asleep on the outdoor sofa bed thing. Next, it was Weirdo's turn to have a bath, then, as Captain Obvious would say it, it was my turn.

Before I had a bath at Perse's place, I was actually telling her about how I can survive without having a bath/shower for days. It's mostly because I'm lazy, but part of the reason is also because I don't sweat unless I do strenuous activities. However, I was finally convinced to have a bath when I ran into Weirdo as he was about to leave the room. I was like, 'A bath must feel really nice right now. Why don't I go have a bath?'

Non, je ne regrette rien. As much as I hate having cold baths, I loved it because the shampoo, conditioner and soap were all awesome. They had freaking HERBAL products for their toiletries. I'm not new to herbal products, but these are legit products because they actually felt EFFECTIVE. As I washed my hair, all I could think was this: 'Wow, my scalp doesn't feel itchy at all! I am not slowly dying of cancer anymore!' (Guess how many times I had to repeat that line that night. Perse's mum loved that line so much, I swear.) I proceeded to tell Perse did after I was done preparing, and the good news is that they were actually dealers of the company that sold those products. Needless to say, I am now applying to be a dealer of that company.

THIS IS JUST TOO AWESOME FOR WORDS.

Whilst we waited for Perse's mum at the hut, I suddenly had this epiphany-but-not-really about Mother Earth and how I've neglected my duties as her daughter. So with pure conviction, I announced, 'Guys, I'm quitting smoking. I am going cold turkey, and you are both witnesses to this.'

They were both really happy for me, which is nice considering how peer pressure is actually the reason why I started smoking in the first place. That and the fact that it's healthier to smoke your own cigarette when people are smoking around you rather than to inhale secondhand smoke.

Perse's mum arrived soon, and we got to leave for the talk (which starts at 7pm) at around 6pm. I was so afraid we were going to get bad seats, but lo and behold—we even got the opportunity to talk to Mr. Parapsychologist and have our books signed before the talk started! Perse's mum (I should really think of a codename for her) introduced us to him. She introduced Perse as someone who could see auras, I was the girl who could see past lives, then Weirdo was the boy who could see spirits. Basically we were known by quite a few people as that bunch of spiritually talented kids for the rest of the nights. I feel quite iffy that they think that way about me especially since I don't even know what I'm doing. I mean, I can't even control those random flashes of past life images and scenes. I suppose I'll have to train myself for that. In the meantime, please bear in mind that I am a novice to this and that I merely do what I do because I like helping people heal themselves. The irony of this is that I myself have a lot of shit to deal with, but oh well whatever.

The talk was about the Mayan calendar. I'll get to that in another post. In the meantime, I'll just talk about what happened after the talk. The night was still young, so Perse's mum asked us what we wanted to do. Initially, she wanted to go listen to bands or something of the sort, but Perse was adamant about going to a certain café. So we went with Perse's decision and headed for the café she wanted to go to. From the outside, I could already see why she loved that café so much. She then introduced me to the owner of the café (I'll have to clear with Perse how they are related. Aunt-niece or cousins, I think?) I ordered a chocolate mint drink and both Perse and Weirdo ordered the raspberry chocolate one. Perse's mum ordered two servings of Spaghetti Pomodoro for all of us to share. As we drank and ate, we got to talk to the café owner who wanted to get a 'past life reading' from me. I didn't see anything as we talked, but I remember seeing something right after I met her. We proceeded to talk about it, and as we did I realised how I had completely forgotten about my real mission in life. What matters is that I remember now, and that I'm really glad I met her. I don't know if I could be there for her on Friday, but I definitely want to help her. Plus, I really love her café and I would love to go back there someday.

When we arrived at Perse's place that night, I had to check out the sky before we went inside. The sky was really clear, and I could see more than the usual visible constellations such as Orion. I wish we had more time to stargaze, but we were all tired and we needed to go back to the city first thing in the morning. So after staying at the sitting room for a few minutes, we all finally decided to go to bed.

Perse woke me up at around 6:20 in the morning, but I was so tired that I just nodded then slept again. When I woke up, it was already around 11am or 12pm. We had brunch at the hut again, this time with tuyo and champorado. I've never tried that mix before, and I don't think I can eat champorado without tuyo ever again. Since Weirdo wanted to see if he could still go to class, we decided to prepare immediately so we could catch a bus as soon as possible. We boarded a bus back to the city at around 1pm (I'm so sorry, Weirdo!) and we arrived at around 7pm. I was either asleep or reading half the time on the bus. It was a good thing I had music with me, otherwise I'd probably have been really restless.

I'm here now, trying as much as possible to document whatever I can remember because I do not want to let the memories go and my stay here in the city is already affecting them. I want to remember and hold on as tight as I can, but the handle is slippery with my sweaty palms.

Like how I'm hanging onto a cliff called 'life', and I can feel my fingers slowly giving up their grasp.

I have a purpose in life, I remind myself. But I'm slowly losing the light.

Edit:

(A) Apparently the cow guts soup dish is called 'Bagisen'. I credit Perse and her mum for this wonderful information.