Does A New Year Really Mean Anything?

I mean, unless you really want a change in your life, then New Year's just another awkward holiday where you have to celebrate just because the calendar says so. I mean, we human beings think we're so smart, and yet we take orders from a calendar...

Anyway, don't mind me. It's just my typical New Year's Anxiety. Whilst most people get this because of all the party preparations and the anxiety regarding change, I'm anxious because I can feel that it will be a very awkward night tonight. If you know my family's situation, you'll understand why. Long story short: My family isn't really the happy type of family. My immediate family doesn't socialise much with relatives, so our New Years' Parties usually consist of a maximum of maybe seven people. And since these seven people do not usually get along well (and sometimes the holidays make it even worse), parties tend to be awkward. Par exemple, we all don't know what to do once it's midnight as we don't pop corks and do other similar things. In fact, the 'liveliest' we can actually get is when we jump around like idiots shouting 'It's <insert year here>!' (The jumping part is an annoying tradition in our family as jumping on New Years' Eve is believed to make you grow taller. I know, I know.)

Even forever alone guy gets to have better parties than that.

I mean, sure, I love my family and all, but it gets really awkward and... 'cheesy', you know? And it's not even cheesy in an aww-I-luffles-you-gaiz way. Nope. It's the uhh-let's-act-happy-because-it's-New-Year sort of cheesy. Just thinking about it makes me shudder.

Anyway, I know that complaining about this is a really bitchy thing to do, so to make up for my severe bitchiness I shall list down things I'm grateful for that's related to this whole New Year thing.

I'm grateful for the food we get to eat, the company we have (even if it's awkward company), the effort everyone gives for this holiday even if I don't believe in it... Well, let's just say I'm grateful that I still have reasons to celebrate New Year's Eve, that's all. (Even if I don't want to.)

So, Happy New Year everyone! Remember, it's nothing to stress yourself about. Happiness doesn't come from the ability to throw the party—it comes from the ability to enjoy the party you've thrown, whether it's successful or not. I love you all and let's treat 2012 nicely. (Sorry, but I hate it when people say 'Let's hope 2012 will be good to us.' Guys, we control our lives, okay? These are just numbers we use to keep ourselves organised.)

Above all holiday greetings, I want you to know that you don't need a calendar or the system setting a date for you to celebrate with me. The fact that I'm in a positive relationship with you is enough cause for celebrations. So, what I want to say is that, New Year or not, I wish you lots of happiness and love. <3